Teaching is hard!!! It is not for those who are weak or unsure of themselves. Now, I don't want this to be a venting entry because I am still in love with my job. Things happen on a daily basis that makes me laugh or makes all the heart break, stress, and struggle worthwhile. From this week having a kid open up to me and tell me about how his heart is breaking because his dad is not happy with his job. To the boys who argued over math in my room during lunch in such a way I was laughing the whole time. To watching my mock trial team come together and accept each other and start to work together. I love my job and I love my students. And I have a lot students who DO NOT FIT what I am about to talk to, it is just that every year it gets worse.
Being a teacher though has given me a very clear and specific window to the world. Whereas, my Dad and family are all in the business world and talk business ALL THE TIME!!! They also love to talk about what is wrong with the world today. But they don't have the same opportunities to see people and the world the way I do. Though we are all on the same page the biggest problem in the world today is the breaking bad parenting and the break down of families. Here are specific issues:
1. Parents do not want to take the time or the energy to fight with their kids to discipline them. They really don't! People may think that I am over reacting but on several occasions this year I have parents say your are right I could punish my kid for skipping school or not doing work by grounding/ taking away cellphones/limiting TV or video games but that would cause fighting and I would have to monitor them constantly plus they would hate me for it and I want my kid to love me and I don't want to fight. To that I want to say GROW SOME BALLS AND GROW UP. You are the adults sometimes it is your job to let your kids hate you!!!!! That is the world that is your job and all your teaching your kid is that they can do whatever they want and in the long run when they are repeatedly fired because they don't know how to behave they will hate you more. Every year I get in kids faces, I fight them, I hold them responsible, and at the end of the year they are the ones who wrote me notes saying I was their favorite teacher because I cared enough about them to fight them, I never gave up on them no matter what they did, and they knew I did it all of it out of love and they will never forget me for that.
2. Parents do not want their kids to be unhappy so they give them whatever they want and they therefore have kids who do not know how to handle any problems. You don't like a teacher we will change you classrooms. Math is too hard because you have to actually think let's drop you levels. Don't like your schools change schools. Seriously, I see it happen all the time. Kids get to run away from their problems instead of learning coping skills. The kids are in control and the parents are a long for the ride.
3. It also works with the fact parents are so eager to believe that everything is anyone's else fault but their student. Their kid fails but it is not their fault it is the teachers faults for not passing their kid despite the fact the kid turned in three assignments all year. The kid is getting suspended for bad behavior and it is the schools fault so to solve it we will change schools. And then parents are SHOCKED when the same problems happen at the new school so whose fault is it....the schools of course, so they change schools AGAIN!!!! I have several students who openly admitted this is their third school THIS school year because the other schools were out to get them and got them in trouble but it wasn't their fault. This is crazy. Kids learn to pass the blame and to not have to take responsibility and actually change their behavior.
4. Last one I want to highlight is the fact that more and more students believe EVERYTHING should be handed to them. They don't come to school with the basic supplies of paper and pencils because it should be provided by the school. Why am I making them study and actually pass tests? They deserve an A because they came to school end of the story, according to them. They are ungrateful and entitled and that attitude is what bothers me the most. In fact, almost every kid this year has said something like....If you want me to take school seriously and do my work you should pay me to do that, adults get paid for the work they do I deserved to get paid for working. They believe it to... they believe not only should they be educated for free....WE SHOULD PAY THEM!!!! And when I do things they want do they appreciate it? NO!! In fact, they go great now that we have this let's get blank.....
Every year it gets worse.....Every year the kids come with more behavioral problems and less involvement by parents. Every year more of the responsibility of raising kids and parenting kids in falling on the teachers' shoulders. Not only are we having to teach kids the basic lessons that should be taught at home and are actually much easier for parents to teach but we are getting less funding and bigger and bigger classes. This year I have 12 different classes and most of them are at about 36 students. I have to counsel students on dealing with fights with friends, how to speak nicely to adults, how to share, how to sharpen a pencil, how to stay strong during the hard times, how to find someone to talk to, how to make friends, hearing about ANOTHER DIVORCE and the kids whose whole world is falling apart because of it and it is breaking their spirit and will, and none of this is my actually curriculum of history. No wonder we have so many problems in society. So much crime, graffiti, gangs, teenage pregnancies, etc.... As amazing as all the teachers I know are we cannot do everything for our students ESPECIALLY without parents.
