The very word resolution makes me think very negative thoughts. Resolutions are something that everyone makes so willingly and breaks just as easily. People spout them without every really wanting to change. All they are is a false promise; to the world and to yourself. I hate the connotation that resolutions bring with them. Now, if you have sincerely made resolutions this isn't meant to be judgmental about you but it is how I feel about life and how things have worked out in the past. Resolutions bring me to mind all the times my dad has proclaimed, "I am done with this. I cannot live like this anymore. I have to do something to lose weight." But the very next meal he eats a lot and then continues to take food from the pantry the rest of the night. (I love my dad but I seriously get sick about hearing his crazy weight lose plans and then watching him eat without realizing it- He is a classic stress eater and he constantly eats without realizing he is even doing it. I will bring up the four handfuls of chips he ate and he really won't know he did that.) Every time I go home my dad and my mom are constantly talking about losing weight. I wish the emphasis was eating healthy meals and doing things to make them feel better because I personally feel like when losing weight is the goal it is easy to become discouraged, frustrated, and give up.
On the other hand- I LOVE GOALS!!! I adore making goals and I love when I accomplish a goal I feel so successful. To me if you don't achieve your goal the first time that is fine because goals are about slowly accomplishing them and goals are about action and not just a desired outcome; whereas resolutions I feel are desired outcomes and the first time you fail you just give up on the resolution but goals are constantly pushing you to do better.
So for all the world to see here are my goals:
1. Go to bed between 9:30 and 10:30 to get about 7 and half hours of sleep a night. I am getting better but this is a hard habit to break because I have been a night owl for SO LONG!
2. To exercise 3 to 4 times a week. (Notice this isn't about losing weight, this is about feeling good about myself and therefore there is no self loathing when I don't meet this goal one week and this is about improving myself.)
3. To find more quiet moments in my life. This is all my fault. Now that I am living alone I tend to turn on the TV as soon as I walk in the door and leave it on even as I go to sleep for the noise but that doesn't leave any quiet times to think, ponder, or even read. As much as my life is so much better on my own and my patience and ability to survive this year has made it a necessity to be alone I do miss how being with roommates would sometimes make me hide out in my room with only a book or my journal so I had more quiet moments.
4. Plan better and Healthier meals. Now that I have the fridge space I want to plan meals and stop eating like a college kid by existing on microwave items and fast food. I want healthier breakfast and lunch items in particular so I will happily take suggestions.
So you already know the progress. Last week I started to get in bed by 10:30 and I really felt the difference. Last night was after midnight though but the good thing about this goal is each day brings a night I can try again to form good habits and I do know it is a good one because last week with going to bed earlier I was more patient and a lot happier at school and today I am definitely less patient.
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