Sunday, August 24, 2008

Today

So today I was called emotionally needed. Honestly, I think that it is hilarious that I was called emotionally needy. And I keep on trying to just let it go but people keep asking me about it or it keeps coming up so I was able to think about it. Someone asked me my side of the story and this is my side. I don't care what this individual thinks of me.
1. I hardly let people into my inner life and inner self. I am very very private and don't let people in so in the end he doesn't know me well enough to pass that judgment off on me. He really doesn't because I would never trust him to really know me and with my emotions and my problems. I am not upset enough to be mean to him or treat him any differently but that is the thing that makes me upset. He is passing judgment on me when he doesn't even know me. He has no basis to make that judgment because he doesn't know me.
2. So the other reason that I find this funny is that I tease these guys relentlessly. I admit it I am always giving them a hard time. At the beginning of our friendship I felt bad but they both just kept on saying that they are big boys and can handle my teasing. Now because of my sarcastic nature I would twist there words and pretend that I was really hurt by there comment. But they always said that they were big boys and could handle the teasing, NONE of which I was ever serious about because honestly I don't care about either one of them enough to really be concerned on if they like my or not. Anyways, now I being called emotionally needy because of this.
3. You have to look at the source. It was coming from one of the most emotionally stunted people I have ever met in my life so it justed made it even more hilarious. Of course we are emotionally needy to him because we have EMOTIONS. Yes I do get happy and I do get upset. Man I am human! Call the pyschologist I actually have feelings and mood changes.
Still the best part of this situation is that the only reason I am even thinking about it and feeling strong enough about it to blog it is because someone asked me for my side of the story. Then when I said it wasn't a big deal and I don't care they said obviously you do care because you are still talking about it and I said," The only reason I am talking about it is because you asked me." Come on genius.........don't ask a question and then try to turn it on me like I cannot get over because I hardly thought about it until you asked me. In fact this is the thing that made me the most upset all night and that is what made me think through everything and feel the need to express myself.

The people who do matter, i.e. the people who know me and whose opinion I trust and could call me emotionally needy, are the ones that I go to when I have problems and I trust with knowing my problems and emotions are also the ones who laugh at the idea I was emotionally needy. By the way called while this was being discussed and I didn't bring it up with them. They couldn't believe anyone would even think that of me. Which made me laugh even more at the idea. The most important people in my life find me stable and not needy so it really doesn't matter what a friend that I am not close with thinks because he doesn't know me well enough to have his opinion matter. I only hung out with him because he could be fun and I have never found much depth to him and so now that he has stopped being fun I am over it. Oh well, back to the tried and true friends. Such as those I spent the night laughing and talking with at a bonfire. the best part of the bonfire was meeting some of the significant others of my close friends and becoming friends with them and also being around Callie. Who is still one of my favorite people. We laughed and Callie jumped around because she felt a bug going down her back. It was so funny.

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